Followers

Thursday, July 22, 2010

OVER THE OBSESSION

How do you know you've moved on?

**********
Last Saturday night while in the middle of having dinner with some blog friends, I saw a familiar face.

He's cute. No, he's handsome. Emanates a sexiness, that was all too familiar. He's attractive, no doubt, but that was not the reason why I kept glancing back his way. I know that laugh. I know that face.

It took me a good five minutes to finally remember.

The guy I saw was Jason.

Once upon a time he was my obsession. I stalked the guy after something happened between us. After that steamy afternoon in my room. After my grandmother caught us in the middle of doing the dirty deed.

I still remember when his birthday is. That for two years, I anonymously sent him birthday texts, and call his landline just to hang up (I know, I was such a loser back then).

It all came back when I finally remembered who he is.

And all I could think about...

Meh.

**********
He was one of the two UP graduates who made me cry. Who in a way broke my heart. I thought I'd feel something again after that.

But there's nothing.

I guess that's how you know you've moved on.

22 comments:

canonista said...

TRUE! I do agree, that we know we have moved on, when the reminders of our painful past no longer open our wounds or ache the scars of our beaten up hearts.

Darc Diarist said...

congratulations! clap clap!

john stanley said...

chanelling celine dion:

"it's all coming back, all coming back to me now"

ang cute!

Kane said...

Engel,

Who knew, after all these years, you would meet again that night ?

So, you feel nothing?

Not affection, nostalgia, resentment? No fondness for the memory you shared? No sadness for all that might have been, and all that was and is no more?

Kane

p.s. So mahilig ka sa taga U.P.? =)

red the mod said...

You've moved on when you don't remember, but rather reminisce; when you acknowledge rather than recognize.

Niel Camhalla said...

Sometimes we just try to make ourselves believe.

caloy said...

i've been there. i know the feeling. :) parang pinipilit mong hanapin na meron, eh wala na naman talaga.

JP said...

time really heals all wounds. :) glad you've moved on.

Ex Jason said...

yet another jason.

oh, to reach the state of no longer feeling anything. it's what we all hope for.

soltero said...

yup have really moved on kung di ka na apektado pag nakita mo syang may ksamang iba. and kapag natatawa ka na sa sarili mo whenever you recall the crazy stuff u did when you were still obsessed with him :)

Jay Quiambao said...

UP graduates. Hmmm. Always been fascinated by UP graduates.

paci said...

coincidence that two up grads made you cry? uhmm, how about graduates from other schools? heehee. =)

Guyrony said...

I will just say AMEN to that. :)

How was the blogger meet-up?

Heard it was quite fun.

Désolé Boy said...

i think somehow it's instinct. in my experience, napansin ko na lang, naka move on na pala ko.

p.s.
nasobrahan ako ng isang "p" eh. pup ako. so di na pala ko qualified sayo. JK, lol!

Mac Callister said...

tumpak,pag wala ng paki or wala ng kabog ng puso,congrats to ur heart na nun success ang paglimot!hehe

orallyours said...

good for you. hi-5!

imsonotconio said...

well good for you that you have moved on already..

congrats!

Pipo said...

Aantayin ko din yung araw na wala na kong mararamdaman. Kasi mahal ko pa din siya at ang sakit sakit na. Hahaha.

ʎonqʎʇıɔ said...

Was that the night we saw Inception? Oooh... he was super cute!

engel said...

@nyl: yup, so you'd understand why i had a hard time moving on, yeah?

@pipo: wait, is your name really pipo or is it popoy? :P

@conio: thanks.

@orallyours: apir! :D

@maccallister: may kapalit na kasi. i guess that's why.

@desole: nahilig ata ako sa mga estudyante na may U and P sa school nila. yung baby ko ngayon may A lang sa gitna. :)

@guyrony: it was nice. got to cross another one on my birthday wishlist. i'm almost complete this year which is nice. :D

@paci: those other schools, i made them cry. KIDDING!!!

@jay q: i guess i liked the smart ones. :)

@soltero: yeah nakakatawa talaga. ang loser ko noong bata pa ako. :D

@ex jason: believe me i liked a number of jasons in the past.

@jp: thank you.

@caloy: you should know. :P

@niel: but there really has nothing. it's been what, six years? defensive much. :)

@redthemod: that's true. :)

@kane: believe me, there was nothing. dati mahilig ako sa mga taga UP. now, not much. pang friends lang. :P

@johnstan: ewww. celine dion! :D

@darc: thanks.

@canonista: yup, although the past wasn't really that painful come to think of it. it was some childish infatuation when you think about it.

ʎonqʎʇıɔ said...

i'd find it hard too kung ganun ka cute. heehee

wv: ditirmin (ika nga sa office, very thick regional accent)

Cio said...

so.. are you free this weekend? Haha