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Tuesday, July 13, 2010

KEEPER

I showed a friend a few pictures of 'the kid'. Yeah, I've been bragging to a few friends of mine about my current relationship. I can't help it, I'm proud of 'the kid'.

Anyway, my friend told me he's a keeper. I agreed. Because he is.

But that got me thinking, how can you tell if someone really is a keeper?

The shallow Engel would say, if he's good looking, has a well sculpted body, has a car or if he's a celebrity. Yeah, I got there a trophy boyfriend. But are those really enough for you to say that a guy is a keeper?

Here are some of the things I look for in a guy for him to be a keeper.

THE SMARTS
I admit, I'm not really super intelligent. I am smart in my own way, but I have yet a lot to learn. So if a guy I am seeing gets my head thinking, yeah for me he's a keeper. I like to learn new things, it keeps me from getting bored. I like that sometimes the kid gives me a lecture on philosophy. I get nosebleed sometimes, but I feel I also get more enlightened.

EXCITING
Like I said, I get bored easy. Maybe that's why before, my relationships had deadlines. After we became a couple, nothing new happens. The relationships fell in routines that sometimes get suffocating. If a guy can get me excited at something, yeah I'm never going to let him go. A spontaneous date out-of-town, enlisting both of us in a fun activity, experimental in bed, if a guy is willing to do something out of the ordinary for the relationship, yeah he's a keeper.

HE HAS TIME
A guy who's willing and able to set aside things so he'd be able to spend time with me is something I'd really really appreciate in a partner. I don't really care if he remembers our 'saries' (month or anniver), what's important is that I get to have quality time with my partner. I'm not a spoiled brat who'd ask a guy to spend a whole weekend with me. I know outside of the relationship people have other lives/friends/family too so I won't go in between them. But it would be great if he could initiate alotting some time so we could be together.

PATIENCE AND A CERTAIN MATURITY
I'm an only child born in the month of February. So I'm a little bit not right in the head. I have tantrums sometimes. There are times I get paranoid. I'm crazy whenever the moon is full. If he has the patience to tolerate these sides of me, then he's absolutely a keeper. As much as possible I avoid being a brat, but there are times when my emotions get the better of me. Sometimes I have 'sumpong' and it often leads to fights. For me, a keeper would just let me vent out, give me time to cool down then talk to me. I know when I make a mistake, I know how to say sorry, I know when I'm at fault. If he still sticks with me after I show my ugly side, then yeah my heart will be his always.


Honestly speaking, the kid doesn't have all of those traits. Specially now that school's getting more and more stressful for him. I don't really mind that. He knows his shortcomings and he makes up for it whenever he can. The relationship is still new, and we still have a lot to learn about each other. But for me he is a keeper, because I know he loves me, and right now that's more than enough.

How about you, tell us what makes a guy a keeper?

18 comments:

iurico said...

hahaha - may ganun?! hangsweeeeeeet naman!

I dont really have anything to contribute. Kasi hanggang ngayon single pa rin ako.

soltero said...

i'm shallow, i don't have any set criteria...
basta sumakto sa vibe ko, it doesn't matter kung ano itsura nya (kahit di gano gwapo basta may dating),kahit ano pa background nya. basta nagkasundo kami, keeper sya :)

Jay Quiambao said...

just who will take me seriously. not for long but at least now. :)

Ex Jason said...

kelangan naniniwala sa long term relationships. pero hindi clingy.

Abou said...

keep the relationship exciting para di ma bore.

Alterjon said...

amen to soltero.

engel said...

@iurico: what can i say, i'm a sweet guy.

@soltero: ang pagkakasundo, madali lang yan. maintaining ang pagkasundo, that's difficult. i'm just saying.

@jay: you're young. you'll meet him.

@ex jason: yeah, that would be nice.

@abou: yan ang mahirap sa PLU relationship. Outside sex, how do you keep the relationship exciting.

@alterjon: see response to Soltero

Désolé Boy said...

interesting!!!
hmmnn...pwedeng gawing guide...parang swak sa mga gusto ko eh...

on the first criteria "The Smart"
actually saken kahit hindi masyado eh. as long as may mga nasasabi syang bago para, like u, may bago naman akong matutunan. kaya ako, as much as possible, i date guys who are not in the same field am in.

and finally, kainggit ha. grabe, napagiiwanan na ang mga gaya kong single dito sa blogosphere, hehe.

wanderingcommuter said...

i believe that regardless how we define the word keeper,every relationship we enter should always be with a keeper. despite, the good things and imperfections..

paci said...

wala rin akong macocontribute. yun lang willingness na maging serious sa relasyon. other than that, nothing specific.

shuhanshi said...

ngayon ko lang nalaman ang blogsite mo my friend. My criteria of a keeper... Hmmm... 1.Doesn't need to be really smart. Im smart enough for both of us.(kiddin!) he doesn't need to be a genius. As long as he is smart enough to make sensible decisions. 2 doesn't need to be the most exciting person around. Im a person who likes routines. 3 i dont mind if he's showy. Hey, if he's proud to show me off to the world, ill just feel flattered. 4 as long as he is of legal age, it doesn't matter. Wisdom is not directly proportional to age. 5 committed to a relationship and is faithful. If he fits those 5 points, then he's a keeper for me.

lee said...

this is really sweet engel :)

i guess, there really is no criteria for knowing if one is a keeper. you'll just know and feel it :)

engel said...

@desole boy: hindi naman. yaan mo next time, i'm not gonna mention the word relationship sa post ko. :P

@ewwik: true. we enter into relationships because we think the people we are with are keepers.

@paci: acceptable. thanks for your input.

@shuhanshi: ang dami!!! welcome sa blog ko my classmate from high school!! yeah, ako nagmemaintain nito. maniwala ka!!! :D

@lee: i guess so. i think this is where we go back to our ideals.

imsonotconio said...

i agree with abou

The Chemistry Guy said...

certain maturity... how envious! :)

arkin said...

someone who doesnt cheat. Who will reciprocate faithfulness with equal respect for the relationship. And someone who thinks that a kid,no matter how young he is, can also understand.

Kay this is me being bitter. And again,someone who doesnt cheat.HahA

Ur kid is very lucky.

engel said...

@arkin: we both are lucky we met each other. :)

@chemistry guy: well, he has to be, because i tend to not be sometimes.

@conio: :)

Fashion Conscious said...

There's no exact formula for a Keeper. I used to be in your shoes. There will be complications especially if the Kid's parents are totally against it. There must be something that connects both of you-not just sex, hobbies, etc. If forgiveness always exists in your relationship then that's a sign of a Keeper. Pride kills relationships. Emotions are fleeting that you tend to be impulsive. Symbols rule the world. Not words nor Laws.

Only time will tell if one is a Keeper. That's why you are required to take a leap of faith. That's how you become fully Alive. That's how you learn to Love completely...